PRKR and I do a weekly podcast for this wonderful piece of shit group of degenerates. I will never need to try heroin or meth because these guys have made me understand how it feels. Every day I know I shouldn’t talk to them and how it is not good for me, but everyday the itch starts happening and I relapse. If you want to learn a little more about how we act as a group read Bread’s recap of our draft in New Orleans. https://10guys1blog.com/2018/09/21/breadtime-stories-nola-ff-draft-2018-recap/

Going back to PRKR and myself we get the opportunity to talk multiple times a week discussing our podcast. On said podcast, PRKR mentioned he was going to do a power ranking for the league. Knowing PRKR as well as I do I knew this would never actually get done, but loved the idea. So cuck away I will.

Power ranking is a phrase and does not have a “Webster” definition, but just for the ignorant followers, I will educate you a little.

1. Ranking.
2. a position in a scale of achievement or status; a classification.
3. “his number-one world ranking”

Now that we have an understating of what ranking means, we also need to understand that when making a power ranking, win/loss records aren’t the be all end all, especially at the beginning of the season. If they were the Browns would currently be ranked higher than the Patriots. False. Below you will see my ranking for the 10Guys1Cup/10Guys1Blog/10Guys1Pod

1. Shit Balls 2-1– My former editor in chief is my number 1 ranked team. I know there will be a lot of outcry from 1 person maybe 2, but let me explain. SB has the second most points scored on the season but has been the most consistent week in and week out. Starting with a 2-1 record and not scoring below 116 yet is very impressive. He is doing all of this with DeVonte Freeman sitting on the bench. His team gets very scary once he has him back as his RB2.
2. Dr. Karatechop 2-1– My lovely counterpart is going to be upset that I don’t have him number 1, which he rightfully should be. Honestly, the only reason he is not number 1 is because fuck him I’m writing the blog and that’s why. Week 1 and week 3 he was the highest scorer in the league and had a below average week 2. He has a lot of faith in Josh Gordon going to the Patriots, but I still feel he is playing a guessing game on who to start each week. He makes the smartest moves when it comes to FA and benching and starting flex players.
3. Commish/Dr.Champs Bitch 1-2– No need to thank me for the humility I have shown in this blog. Would it have been easy to rank myself #1? Would it have been right? The answer is yes. However, we had a below average week 1 scoring the lowest points in the league. Since then we have regrouped and put up a sexy 136 and 127. If PRKR wouldn’t have dropped the nuke of 163 on me week 2 I would be sitting pretty at a 2-1 record.
4. Space Ghost 2-1– #4 and #5 were very hard for me, but I feel that Spaceghost’s team has been underperforming and is right behind Shit Balls for the best team. Picking up Patrick Mahomes has been big for him, I do hope he shits the bed this week against the Broncos, and can easily lead Space Ghost to the promise land. The Zeke McCaffery duo he has is nasty and that is with a Cowboys team that isn’t properly feeding their RB’s. Let’s see if Josh Rosen can help Larry Fitzgerald out and Space Ghost will really be flying.
5. PRKR 1-2– PRKR has the highest points scored for and against in the league which made putting him at #5 difficult. Mathematically he should be higher, but I don’t like his team. His bench is all RBs which isn’t horrible when you look at his 4WR he starts every week. This issue is if one of them gets injured and you mix that with upcoming byes he will be hurting. It should be noted he does have LeVeon Bell and I couldn’t imagine how well he would be doing if he was playing. Lucky for him he was gifted James Conner who is currently ranked the #4 RB in FF. How FUCKING convenient.
6. Michelle 1-2– This guy is a dick so i’ll keep it quick. His team is good even with Kenyan Drake as his RB2. He is banking on Ingram coming off of suspension, but I do not see him taking away a lot from Kamara. I told you JuJu was a WR2.
7. Duttin 2-1– We all know luck has a lot to do with FF and the Duttin is the luckiest motherfucker out there. On paper, his team looks great, but Aaron Rodgers has been iffy and AB’s feud with the Steelers isn’t helping him much. I love Royce Freeman, but splitting carries with Lindsay is hurting his FF points. The Duttin will walk into the playoffs and end up losing in the Championship or Semis just like every other year.
8. John Denver 2-1– If the Duttin is lucky JD is the leprechaun at the end of the rainbow. Alvin Kamara has kept him around and I honestly hope he makes the playoffs this year. Him being a shoe-in for the sacko/taco/last place/worthless piece of shit year in and year out really hurts our brand of being the greatest FF league of all time. He does have Julian Edelman and Alshon Jeffery on his bench which will be two great WR once they actually play. What happens when Jamis Winston comes back? Will JD and the Fitzmagic keep rolling. Tune in next week to find out.
9. Owen Wilson 1-2– Owen Wilson should be 0-3 (haha get it), but even a blind squirrel finds a nut once. I made easy work of him last week and watched as he left a billion points on the bench. Which he will do again this week, because he just assumes players will score the exact amount week in and week out and doesn’t look at match ups. Call Dr. Karatechop and let him teach you a thing or two.
10.  Bread 1-2– Like a nice french bread Bread just needs time to let the yeast rise. He hasn’t started out hot, but that is thanks to a plethora of injuries. When Michelle’s players get injured it is because he doesn’t know how to draft. When Bread’s gets injured its shit luck. Bread has put together a great team and is turning his FF misfits into the Oakland A’s of the league. They made the playoffs maybe he can as well.

I am sure some salty boys will think of writing a rebuttal to this, but realize that you can’t argue against the TRUTH and will stop. I will try to get one of these out every couple weeks, but I really don’t think you all want to read how I jump from #3 to #1.

-Commish